The whole damned site without all the walking

This is the entire website summarized for fellow ADD people who do not have the patience to read the whole damned thing. If your attention already wandered, welcome back. We removed the scenic route and several hundred words you were never going to read anyway.

Here is the short way around.

The Drug Apostles are an experimental punk and noise project operating out of Château d’If in Iola, Kansas, with Southern California punk roots going back to 1980. The music combines punk, industrial noise, EDM, disco, hip-hop and spoken word with aggressive guitars, heavy sub-bass and dystopian storytelling.

We call it Sonic Vandalism.

The drums provide the pulse. The bass supplies the weight. The guitars bring aggression. The vocals tell the story. Everything else colors the damage.

Influences include Crass, Rudimentary Peni, Throbbing Gristle, Sonic Youth, John Cooper Clarke, Current 93 and The Black Arabs, who combined punk with machine rhythm.

Everything follows one rule. Chaos must be in harmony.

The band is currently working on the EP Me Gusta la Mala Vida, featuring the completed track Racing Thoughts.

WHO IS BEHIND THIS MESS

The project began as The Drug Apostle. It became plural because that sounded more like a band and less like a lonely religious pamphlet. One person remains behind the curtain.

Gultchy Amore writes, records, produces, mixes, masters and creates the artwork from an apartment in Iola using an iPad. The other members are characters and pieces of the same personality, as well as roles guest musicians can perform.

After years in punk bands and working as a Los Angeles stagehand, Gultchy set music aside. The pandemic destroyed his work and housing, diabetes began taking his vision and depression nearly finished the job. Therapy, disability, low-income housing and a miniature dachshund named Roach helped him survive. Then he opened GarageBand. The noise became songs, the songs became purpose and The Drug Apostles crawled out of the wreckage.

THE DIVINE COMEDY PLAYERS

Gultchy Amore is the instigator, architect, vocalist and unreliable narrator. Sonic Jesus keeps the low end. Remus and Romulus create guitar violence through chainsaw tone and Disturbing Fuckery. Kaptain Skipper navigates when everybody argues about where the ship is going. DJ Fuck You cuts beats apart and makes the argument part of the groove.

OUR DEEPLY QUESTIONABLE PHILOSOPHY

We are recreationally confrontational. Question everything. If somebody claims to speak for God, ask to speak to their manager. Do not confuse obedience with morality or silence with peace.

THE PEOPLE WHO LIT THE FUSE

Marion Anderson and Goose 666 gave Gultchy the courage to make music under his own name.

Marion believed in him when he did not believe in himself. Goose was a bandmate, roommate, friend and fearless collector of opinions. When fear got in the way, he reminded Gultchy that he might fall on his face, but he might also succeed.

They are remembered with love, gratitude and respect.

TRANSMISSIONS AND OTHER EVIDENCE

The Ludovico Technique is our YouTube channel for music videos, punk commentary, stories, satire and Max Headroom-inspired transmissions. Racing Thoughts portrays a panic attack. Other broadcasts ask whether punk is dead or prove that if you are going to be dumb, you had better be tough.

Gultchy Sez is our Substack for music, merchandise and other updates. The Antisocials connect you to Facebook, TikTok and Instagram because apparently one dystopian communication network was not enough.

SAINTS AND CREATIVE MISFITS

The Drug Apostles are theater. The EP is the play, the instruments are the actors and the music is the script.

Guest musicians step into established roles and receive proper credit. These contributors are the Saints of The Drug Apostles. Musicians, artists and creative misfits are welcome.

THE BLACK MARKET

Music is available now. The Me Gusta la Mala Vida EP and apparel are coming soon.

You may also purchase Gultchy Amore’s completely legitimate guide, How to Succeed in the Afterlife. For twenty-five dollars, it will be sent telepathically after your death. Heaven, hell, purgatory or haunting somebody’s attic, we have you covered.

No shipping. No handling. No refunds after death.

THE SHIT HOUSE AND SHOOTING GALLERY

The Shit House is the website’s bathroom wall. Roast the band, post art, drop memes or contribute beautifully unhinged nonsense. The marker is permanent.

The Shooting Gallery welcomes artwork that is strange, beautiful, disturbing, offensive or impossible to ignore. No gatekeepers. No pearl clutching.

REPORTS FROM OUTSIDE THE WALLS

Eat My Brains, written and performed by Annika, speaks honestly about insecurity. The Shadow Side of Punk, by Hudley Flipside, examines the pain and survival beneath punk mythology. There is also an Oakland Punk House interview with Nicky Noclass about the East Bay scene and magick.

CHÂTEAU D’IF, IOLA, KANSAS

The Drug Apostles operate from Iola, Kansas. A blue dot in a red dot in a red state. The conservative, church-centered town is the pressure chamber. The apartment is called Château d’If after the prison in The Count of Monte Cristo.

The Drug Apostles do not represent what Iola wants to be. They represent what it cannot completely suppress.

ROACH, THE SECOND DRUG APOSTLE

Roach is a miniature dachshund, guardian of Château d’If and Gultchy’s best friend. During the worst depression, Roach still needed food, water and care. By forcing Gultchy to get up and care for him, Roach cared for Gultchy too.

Some people say dogs are just animals. We know better.

SPANGING ON THE WEB

Support keeps The Drug Apostles operating. Listening, following, sharing the music or telling somebody this peculiar corner of the internet exists also helps.

YOU HAVE SURVIVED THE SHORT WAY AROUND

That is The Drug Apostles in one page. Music, noise, survival, dead friends, a dog, imaginary band members, questionable theology and one person making chaos become a song.

For more detail, stories, videos, artwork, bad decisions and the full sermon, proceed to the actual site.

Enter The Book of Sonic Vandalism at TheDrugApostles.com.

You took the short way around. The long way is much more interesting.